Nature and Animals

Nath and I and Deez our dog have been walking daily to Black Swan lake in Lakelands where we live. For thousands of years the indigenous Australians travelled and camped in Lakelands which is named after the many swamps and lakes that were in this area. Black Swan Lake Mowyn Kuljak and Paganoni Lake Berong, provided an abundance of food and bush medicine.
The lakes have spiritual significance to aboriginal people. They were believed to be an integral part of the Wagyl dreaming which comprises a track along a chain of lakes extending from Yanchep to Australind. The lakes were formed several thousand years ago as the sea level began to recede.
Two weeks ago we were walking on our usual route. The day was a perfect spring morning, although officially spring didn’t arrive until last week. The azure blue sky was cloudless, and the soft warm breeze brought the pleasant smell of new growth, (unless you are allergic and susceptible to hay fever, then it may not be so welcome). Birds were flying and chirping merrily as if to welcome early spring. We ambled across the bridge and in the distance we could see the traffic heading for the new freeway. It’s a great feeling of freedom to know that every Thursday and Friday you are not part of the human race rushing to work. As we walked along a track which runs parallel with the train that runs from Mandurah to Perth we could hear the mooing of cattle long before we could see them. As we turned the bend in the road by the huge green trees that have been there for hundreds of years we could see a white cow standing by the railway line, next to the wire fence that cuts us off from the railway lines. He saw us coming and gave a long mournful moo, as if to say I’ve been waiting here all night for a train. On the left side of the track there was a farm with cows and their calves. We stopped for a few moments to enjoy this peaceful country scene. The animals looked at us and gave a couple of moos and nods of heads. Others kept on feeding their young and looked contentedly at us, wondering who were these people staring at them. Overhead crows, magpies and other birds were flying close by. We even encountered some dragon flies and the first bees of spring.
Several cows came up close to the fence where we were standing and allowed us to take photos seeming to be preening and smiling for the camera. The cow waiting for the train simply stood and watched our antics. We were thoroughly enjoying our commune with the animals and with nature when we finally decided it was time to continue our morning exercise.
Then Diesel made his move. He is the kind of dog who loves to make new friends, no matter where he is he always thinks he it’s a social situation that he needs to be involved in. When a dog growls him or wants to fight, Diesel looks bemused as if he can’t believe that somehow this dog doesn’t want to be friends with him. As we turned to leave, Diesel who had been watching the animals suddenly noticed the hole in the fence and tried to get under it. Instantly we were almost in the middle of an affray. The cow closest to the fence mooed loudly as the white cow outside the fence started to amble down toward us. In just a few moments all the cows began to moo angrily in response and started coming over to help their mate. One of the cows noticed the hole in the fence and began to lean down as if to come outside and charge Diesel. Poor dog he had no idea what was happening all he wanted to do was play.
We moved rather quickly just in case and were soon far from the lovely quiet country scene which had suddenly turned into something similar to animal farm, when those bad dudes wanted to take it over.

A laser Party is like no other

Jamie and I seem to have a penchant for meeting new people and making them our best friends. Before his stroke, when he could walk Jamie was always able to be seen out and about in the community talking with someone.
We have been going up to Perth to an Eye Specialist who has been giving Jamie laser treatment for Glaucoma and pressure behind the eye. I think of it as a small TIA. As this was our third visit we knew the drill. Patients wait patiently in the patient waiting room for at least two hours or more. There are eye drops to be administered, photos of an eye or two to be snapped and then the business of the laser treatment begins. I have to admit it kind of concerned me that I could sit in the room with Jamie during his laser treatment yet had to wear a mask cover my eyes.
We set off early for our one hour drive to the city, when we arrived I was able to find ‘my’ disability parking spot which always seems to be waiting for us. The surgery was really full and I noticed that people looked up from whatever occupation had been taking their attention and contrived to look without any eye contact at the latest person to enter the door. That was us. A man kindly jumped up and opened the door for Jamie to wheel himself through. I’m trying to help him become more independent and do stuff for himself. However, I think I’m like my mother, if you do it yourself it saves time and is easier. Also, I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings when they offer to help us.
It seemed kind of silly to spend the next 3 or 4 hours trying to pretend we weren’t there, so when we walked in and spotted a group of people, I thought, ‘These will be my audience they can’t get away’. So we sat down. As Jamie said quite loudly, ‘Hello’ people slowly looked up from their magazines, mobile phones, IPads or just from trying to sleep. They all responded in their own ways to his greeting. Jane had been waiting for 2 hours and 35 minutes and was sure it was going to be her turn next. David was there with his Dad who was reading a paper with yesterday’s date on it, had he really been there that long? Another lady I called Eloise was hiding behind her magazine. Sure enough Jane was called up, she was so excited she gave us all a little bow as we clapped. Then there were four. Carlo had been many times and was trying to reassure the lady next to him that when the Doctor lasered your eye it hurt like mad, but felt good when it was over. I’m not sure he helped her fears really.
Finally, it was our turn, 3 and a half hours after entering the surgery and hearing other people’s stories of horror operations that went wrong, ( I guess that is why they were horror operations.) The Nurse came and wheeled Jamie into the surgery. When it was all over and we were on our way out of the surgery, all the people we had been speaking to called out good bye and waved us through the door.
I think they liked us.

The Passport

Instructions to apply for a Passport appear quite simple and straightforward. To renew an Australian Passport appears even more simple and straightforward. One can download the forms, fill them in and take them to the Post Office. Following this a photo is taken which generally makes the passport owner look like a convicted criminal. It is attached to the form then all that is needed is a signature. Easy enough really in the grand scheme of things.

Today was a special day for Jamie, he spruced himself up, had a shave, cleaned and polished his wheelchair (well that part isn’t entirely correct). Then off we drove to the post office for ‘The Passport’. Since his stroke Jamie has had problems using his dominant hand, it tends to shake and fly about now and again which makes it hard to write. So he has been practicing writing with his right hand and not doing too badly.

We planned our visit to the post office carefully so we didn’t have to be in a long queue with the wheel chair. It was mid morning 30 minutes before lunch so the workers would still be working.
We drove in and found a perfect disabled car space close by. I was even offered help t by people watching me struggle with getting the chair out of the car. When we arrived at the post office, sure enough, we had timed it perfectly, there was only a small queue of five people.

When it was our turn, Jamie wheeled himself up to the counter and said proudly and (loudly) ‘I want to renew my passport please’. The girl at the counter took his photograph, the first one didn’t turn out so well so she took another. When she realized we had a stack of crates in front of us and could barely move the wheelchair she came around to the front of the counter to help us. By this time there was a small crowd. Have you ever noticed when you are in a public place people like to look without appearing to do so. Heaven forbid there anybody should be seen to make eye contact. Finally the photographs were approved of and Jamie had to sign in a very small space on his passport document. He leaned forward and slowly, slowly started to write. ‘You must write inside this square,’ he had been warned. As he wrote the crowd leaned forward as if to give him moral support. Finally it was over and he had made his signature. Alas the last letter of his surname was poking out of the square as if to say ‘let me out of here I want to go and explore. ‘Sorry’, said the post office clerk, you will have to try again. So as Jamie drew in a deep breath the ever growing crowd did the same and ever so slowly leaned forward as Jamie proceeded to write. Triumphantly he called out I think I did it this time. I had said try to leave only small spaces but he thought I meant make small letters and they all looked a bit like spindly ants as they crept along the page. Remembering my idea of pretending I was in a movie when things got hard. I stood up and clapped loudly, the crowd followed suit.
Our excitement didn’t last long. ‘Alas, you will have to go home and try again’. The helpful post office lady advised us. By this time I was thinking we should have just asked if we could mark the space with an X. It was rather disconcerting to see the crowd was now so large the queue was moving out of the door.
Now as we were preparing to leave we found that in front of us was a sea of people who were crowding wheel chair space with parcels, trolleys and prams. A kind Irishman urged us forward, ‘you can do it dearie’ he said. So, lifting my head high I strode forth through the melee presenting the crowds with a small enigmatic smile as the cameras rolled on the next scene. “That has to be a take, I thought to myself, 'I’m sure that was my best role ever.

Help! They are Murdering English

Recently I read a comment in an overseas paper, stating that foreign students studying in Britain will be educated in the etiquette of queuing. The Brits do the queuing thing exceedingly well, however the foreign students are not so well versed in this habit. Some cultures even hold a scrum every time a bus turns up, apparently.
As I didn't plan to write about this subject I shall segue to my main topic, the English language as spoken in Australia.
The letter L appears to have been replaced from the the word Australia by the letter Y. Australia has now become Austraya. I think this is unfair to the letter L and also it makes Australia sound even more like Austria. Is this a conspiracy? Are the Austrians now taking over Austraya?
Then there is the (wonderful) State of Western Australia (WA) now often referred to as Dubba u A. Oooh wait, doesn't that sound like Dubai?
I formally declare myself proud of the L, see how it stands up tall and straight. I personally think it is more upstanding than the Y. If this makes me a revolutionary and non conformist, so be it.
One more thing I find particularly annoying is using 'u' in place of the curly little 'e' as in uleven for eleven. There is a place for the Y and the U but not in Australia, WA and eleven.
I'm off to make and sell cheap placards stating 'down with Y, up with L and E.